Category Archives: Lifestyle

Have you seen your family lately?

Yesterday was the 10th anniversary of Family Day – a Day to Eat Dinner With Your Children. This “holiday” (or movement, perhaps?) was created by CASA, The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse, because its studies show that the more often children eat with their families, the less likely they are to smoke, drink, or use drugs. Family dinners also have a direct impact on positive self-image, higher grades and parent-child communication. So CASA created a holiday to encourage people to eat family dinners.  Did you celebrate it by sitting down to dinner with your family?

It makes me sad that we need a holiday for this. Sad that we need need an annual reminder to sit down at the table together and share a meal and talk about our day. But since we apparently do need that reminder, I’m grateful that CASA has stepped up to provide it and that other companies who believe in the power of a family dinner have joined them to sponsor and publicize it.

As one example, Stouffer’s has partnered with Todd Parr, a children’s author who has penned a new book called “Let’s Fix Dinner”  in celebration of this day. It’s available for a limited time through the link I included here. (I just ordered mine!) Incidentally, Todd Parr also wrote “This is My Hair,” one of my daughter’s most favorite books when she was a toddler…love love love that silly book.)

I am a big believer in the importance of family dinners. My own family sat down to a meal together every night growing up, as did my husband’s family. Our growing family eats together every night now unless my husband is traveling for work. Sometimes that means we eat early or late to accommodate our schedules…but we do it.  We all look forward to that symbolic point in our day when we come together from our disparate activities – work, preschool, tumbling, kindergarten, errands, exercise, whatever – and reconnect in one place, at one time, around one table as a family.  I’m frankly a little anxious about how our ritual may need to adjust as our children grow older and begin to participate in activities that cut into the family dinner hour. My hope is that we’ll be so attached to this family tradition that we’ll do whatever we can to preserve it, as often as we possibly can.
Since I love to cook, these family dinners provide an opportunity to put home-cooked food on the table, but the data from CASA suggests that it’s not so much the food that matters. It’s the ritual. The connection. The conversation that unfolds. So please don’t pressure yourself to prepare a homemade feast if you can’t see your way there. Simply put food on the table and eat. Pick up takeout if that’s what works. Just eat. Together. You’ll be glad you did.
If you’re already having family meals, will you write a comment below this post and share why they’re important to you or how you make them fit into your schedule? And if you’re not having them as often as you’d like, can you try to have one family meal a week and let that be your ritual? It could be Sunday breakfast or Friday dinner or whatever works for your family. Just do what you can; you’ll create an opportunity for your children to open up and share about their day and for you to make memories you’ll always cherish. If the toddler runs laps around the table while everyone eats, so be it. If your teenager doesn’t talk at all, so be it. Do it anyhow. Routinely. And let the ritual do its work.

Perhaps if we all commit to eating as families as often as we can, we won’t need an annual holiday to remind us of why these dinners matter. We’ll be celebrating them all year.

Does your life have enough “white space”?

From time to time (and with his permission!) I’ll be re-posting some things written by Leo Babauta on his ZenHabits blog. Leo has an interesting and admirable philosophy of un-copywriting his content, preferring that others help to spread the word. I find that a number of his posts reinforce the principles I teach at Nourish and  I hope they will inspire you on your path to well-being. This one beautifully illustrates the “Rest” principle.


Create space.
Post written by Leo Babauta. Follow me on twitter .
I’m not a designer, but I’ve always been in love with the design concept of white space.
It’s the space in a design that isn’t filled with things — as you can tell from the design of Zen Habits and my other blog, mnmlist, it’s something I use (perhaps too) liberally.
But white space can be used in the design of our lives as well, not just the design of magazines and websites and ads. By using white space in our lives, we create space, balance, emphasis on what’s important, and a feeling of peace that we cannot achieve with a more cramped life. Let’s look briefly at how to do this.

 The principles of white space

Some of the things white space accomplishes in design:
  • greater legibility
  • feeling of luxury
  • breathing room & balance
  • more emphasis
These same concepts can translate to our lives:
  • Clarity. Instead of legibility, white space can give clarity to the things in our lives — whether they’re possessions, projects, tasks, or just things that occupy our time and attention. A nice piece of furniture is more beautiful when it’s not surrounded by clutter. A well-prepared piece of food is more tasty when it’s not smothered in sauces and piled with fries and cheese. A presentation is more effective when we don’t use Powerpoint and have only a few points to make.
  • Peace. When our lives are cramped, and our homes and workspaces are cluttered, we feel stressed. When we have fewer things on our schedule and fewer things around us, we feel peaceful.
  • Breathing room & balance. Many people talk about finding “work-life balance”, but this is very hard to do if you have no white space. Leave space between things to find the breathing room you need, and to easier achieve balance.
  • Emphasis on the important. When our days are non-stop busy, everything is important and nothing is important. But put white space between things, and those things acquire more weight, and we place more importance on each individual thing.

Achieving white space

In theory, achieving white space isn’t difficult: you remove non-essential items from your life, your workday, your surroundings, your possessions, and leave the essential items with space around them.
But of course in practice it’s a bit different, and requires experimentation, learning, practice. I’d suggest starting small, with one area of your life, and making small bits of white space. Start by identifying what’s important, and the slowly removing the non-essential things to create the white space.
Some ideas:
  • Breathe. Simply take a couple minutes between tasks, meetings, anything that you do, to breathe. After a meeting, for example, return to your desk and just sit still for a couple minutes, focusing on your breath going in and out. When you get home, pause and breathe. When you’re done with a task on the computer, close everything and breathe, before starting on the next task. This creates space between tasks and allows you to focus on each one.
  • Schedule. Don’t overschedule. Leave space on your schedule, between tasks, instead of putting things back-to-back. The space gives you time to go between tasks, to recover, to refocus, to breathe.
  • Projects. Do fewer projects at a time. Instead of juggling a bunch of projects at once, try to do one for as long as you can before switching to the next (sometimes you need to switch because you’re waiting on information or on someone else to do something). If you can, take a short break between each project — as long as you can afford.
  • Sit. Start your day with the white space of just sitting still for 10 minutes. It can be a meditation session, or simply sitting still with a cup of coffee or tea. If you like this, try putting it in the middle and end of your day as well.
  • Remove clutter. Pick a few important things on your desk, or in your home, and remove the rest. This will give you visual space and create a more peaceful atmosphere.
  • Savor. Slow down and savor everything you eat, everything you do. Breathe before you take each bite, and enjoy each bite.
You can read more about simplicity in Leo’s books, The Zen Habits Handbook for Life & The Simple Guide to a Minimalist Life. More here.

Can’t Talk Now Mom, I’m Exercising!

The kids “exercising” on makeshift elliptical machines

“Children learn what they live” is an adage my mom often quotes. It’s a powerful reminder to be careful about the example we as parents set for them in daily life. It’s not what we say that they’ll necessarily remember or take heed of; it’s what we do.


So, the other day I watched as my son overturned one of our kitchen stools, placed his hands on the now upturned legs, and ran his little legs in place as fast as they would go. He was huffing and puffing and fully occupied as I stood nearby wondering what was going on. Before I could ask, he looked up at me, waved and said “Hi Mommy! Can’t play ‘wich’ you right now, I’m exercising.” Then he held up two toddler fingers and said, “I’ve got two more minutes.” He was pretending to be on an elliptical trainer like the one we have in our home gym!

I was unequivocally amused by this exchange until I realized that he was playing back something he’s probably heard from me a time or two (or twenty) if I was wrapping up an early morning workout as he came downstairs with his Daddy to start his day. “Learn what they live”, indeed! I guess he’s taken the good with the bad in this case.

While this particular interchange certainly inflicted a bit of guilt (over making him play alone while I exercise), it also made me happy that my kids are picking up on the notion that exercise is fun. And a priority. And a part of our everyday life. As a result, there are other preschool-isms about exercise that come out from time to time. Ones like:

“I’m soaky sweaty! That’s b’cause I’m exercising!”  or 
“My bones in my body are getting stronger b’cause I’m exercising.” or
“Please I ride my bike too, Daddy?” or
(While playing Barbies)  “Where’s the Mommy?” “Oh! She went to Pilates!”

My kids think exercise is fun; it’s a natural outlet for their energy and an exhilarating way to spend part of their day. I only hope that what they’re observing and mimicking in our household today fuels a lifelong exercise habit for them. 

Children learn what they live. Not surprisingly, Mom was right….again.